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Reflections Without Mirror
You can be what you want to be.*
The experience that I am sharing here today happened a long time ago but I believe many people who are passing through rough times would be encouraged by it.
I have read somewhere that God is a God of second chance, but I think that is even wrong , I believe God is a God of many chances. My belief stems from my experience. Whilst I accept that we should try hard not to miss our opportunities but if it happens , there would still be other opportunities.
I cannot recollect whether we were afforded the opportunity to meet Career Guidance and Counsellors in our school at Oke’badan or any other school during our time in school.
What I remember, however, is that I have decided to be a lawyer and made this known to my teacher and friends when I was in Primary four. My decision was informed by providence, my nature of courage, argument and sharpness on many matters.
Many people started noticing these traits in me in our compound, they were suggesting that I should be a lawyer since I like argument so much and never give up on issues. When I informed my mother at that tender age that I would like to be a lawyer when I grow up, my mother hesitated and asked me whether as a christian I am prepared to join Ogboni confraternity because she believed all lawyers must be a member of the confraternity. I demurred and made it clear I cannot and will not join any confraternity. I tried to allay her fears and promised her that I will not join confraternity. The general belief then was that all lawyers are in one confraternity or the other, confraternity was taking over the yoruba land in the 60s and the early70s amongst lawyers and politicians. I made up my mind that I will not join any secret society in life whatsoever and I will be what I want to be by the grace of God.
It was on that premises that I entered the great Oke’ badan Boys High School. I was on course until I reached Form 3. It was a defining moment in my life . I was grouped in Class 3c. It was the most formidable class I had ever been. Incidentally, it was there I lost my direction. After we finished in Form 3 C , I managed to pass and got promotion to Class four , I used the word manage because it was in that year that I started losing focus as we considered ourselves big boys. Every weekend was party and we treated ourselves with cigarettes and beers at these parties.
We were to pick our subjects which would, of course, to a larger extent, shape what we will study or be in the future . I was not in the school when we were to submit our selective subjects so I came on the last day . I called Wasiu Abiola to one side and asked him what he picked as his selective subjects apart from the mandatory ones. In those days there were three popular professions. 1. Medical Doctors (2) Lawyers
(3) Engineers.
I made it known to Wasiu that my ambition was to become a lawyer and in any event I was not so good in science subjects. The school did not provide any advice in choosing our career so I was intrigued on if I did not make it in becoming a lawyer, what other options are available for me?. Wasiu appeared to know more than me in this area and despite the academic rivalry between us then , we like each other and he was more serious in the school than me so I relied on his judgment. Wasiu lectured me that with the subjects that he chose and I am choosing , one can also study Mass Communucation or Economics. He told me that even Baba Layode actually wanted to be a lawyer but he couldn’t make it so he chose education line and became a teacher and rose to become principal. I do not know where Wasiu got this story from.
Anyway , I selected the same subjects that Wasiu picked and we were grouped together in 4 C, a social science class. We were told that you can either choose ‘Government’or ‘History’ but you can not choose the two together, no reason was advanced for this. Akeem Ladipupo chose history at that time. We chose Government. Most of us who are lawyers in this forum were Art students with the exception of Barrister Tunde Sanu .
Tunde Sanu was a science student , I do not know whether he had it in mind then to become a lawyer too but I remember a family member of his is/was a lawyer. I am yet to solve the conundrum, if he had wanted to be a lawyer why did he go to science class, yes he was brilliant though but he should have picked social sciences or Art subjects if he knew he wanted to study law, he alone can solve that puzzle for me. Anyway he is a lawyer today
I do not normally present in the school everyday for a reason which I will highlight at another time and I do not normally study at home and always pass my exams without cheating. I have a retentive memory and this gave me false confidence that followed me till our final exam, the almighty WAEC. I relied too much on my ability to remember things but how can I remember things if I was always absent and did not study hard . It appeared I had lost direction and my desire to be a lawyer has reduced drastically, there were many side attractions that were beckoning. This remind me of the book ‘ *Igbo* *Olodumare* ‘ ( *The Forest of God) written by DO Fagunwa* where the author described how his father met his mother , he wrote ” *Olowo Aye ko Ipako si Igbo Olodumare , Baba mi to Obinrin lo’* ( *Olowo Aye turned his back to The Forest of God , my father followed a woman)* in order words, his father forgot his mission which was to go and hunt and gather wisdom at the prestigious forest of God but instead was running after a lady. Many of us as students at that time forgot our mission in school but doing other irrelevant things; the result was failure. Those who majored in minor cannot succeed in the school at all.
It was close to our exam that I started reading and by then it was too late. I made only 2 credits although the results were very poor that year . I was owing the school some money, i must have spent the money to buy cloth for one occasion. Anyway, the principal, Reverend Shokefun claimed I owed money and will not be allowed to see my result until I brought my Dad and payment was made . My dad was disappointed when my results were disclosed because he came with his friend too and they all thought I will do well. They had confidence in me because they were not aware that I had lost focus. WAEC Results that year was very bad and almost 90 percent of us did not do well.
I raised this issue with Adeyemi Adeyemo, (my classmate) and he too could not believe his result , he even thought that the principal must have been drunk to announce that result to him . That can never be his result but it was . The result that year was terrible. It cut across all schools in the State
After I received my results , I rediscovered myself , I know what I can do if I am determined . I bought some books but there was no money to pay for GCE. My parents were not prepared to support me because I had let them down by my poor result. However, by that time, I had a girlfriend who loved me dearly, she sold her chain for N50 ( she inherited the chain from her late mother) so that I can pay for my GCE , she is happily married and now and a grandmother, we have been in contact regularly as we remain good friends though providence had it that we would not be husband and wife. I always pay her back in my own little way for what she did at that time. I can never forget her kindness to me in life, I told my wife of what she did when we were young and I introduced her to my wife .
I registered for GCE and I cleared all my subjects. I studied on my own as I did not need to attend any extral tutorials because I was very focused. I made distinction in most of my subjects. The rest is history . I moved to abroad and studied law in the UK and made 2.1, I proceeded to law school at The University of Westminster and passed.
My dream at tender age was realised, I became a lawyer and did not join any secret society and will never join any secret society .
We can do it if we are determined, and there is no mountain that a man can not climb if he set his mind on it . It is not how many times a man falls that matters but how he stands up. It is not how many times a man falls but the fortitude that he brings to it. We all need fortitude to achieve things even in the face of many adversities. We need courage to climb higher in life.
Finally, I think our secondary schools need career guidance and counselling to advise students on how to choose a career. Lack of it is creating problems in our society. Leaving the young ones to make a choice without proper guidance is not good in my opinion .
Until i see you next week, may your good dreams come true and may the desire of your heart be granted.
Niyi Aborisade is a lawyer, human right activist and an Historian.
